We live a frugal life. My husband and I talk about money often. We are always calculating and adjusting how much we spend, save, and invest. All of these are great habits, which have taken years to establish. But one thing I didn’t anticipate after being debt free, including our house, was still battling feelings of jealously regarding other people’s purchases.
Recently, a friend shared pictures of a house they were planning to purchase. It was lovely. Everything was new and updated. The kitchen was amazing (I desperately want a new kitchen). They had enough bedrooms for all their children. There was even an office for her husband. I was so happy for her, but deep inside I felt a little sad that I don’t have my dream house. I tried to ease the ache in my heart by telling myself that they are going to have a big mortgage, and we’re mortgage free. But the feeling persisted.
When instances like these arise, I have to consciously remind myself to be grateful for all the things I do have. I have 5 healthy children. I have a great little house. It’s small, but we’ve always been able to shift things around make the space work. We have clothes to wear and food to eat. We’re pretty damn lucky. Do I need my dream home? No. Everything I need, I already have.
Learning to be content with what we have is probably the most important part of living a frugal life. I think jealously is something we all have to contend with from time to time. It’s normal to feel passing moments of envy. Sometimes it seems like everyone else is living a better life than you – especially when you only see the highlight reel on social media and not the whole story. But the important part is that you acknowledge your feelings, don’t brood about your situation, and remember all the amazing things in your life.
Instead of sulking about my dream house, I am choosing to love the house I own. I have been dreaming of a new kitchen for 14 years. It’s taken me a looooooong time, but I’ve finally come to terms with the fact that we will probably never have a spare $30,000 laying around to remodel. I simply have to make the most of the kitchen I currently have. Lately, I’ve been busy dreaming up ideas on how to make our space better. And you know what? I am so excited about the possibilities. Will it be perfect? No. But it will be so much better than what we’re currently working with.
The moral of the story is, we have lots to be grateful for. And I bet you do too! Remember, comparison is the thief of joy.